Canada to send “Non Combat” troops to Ukraine


Photo: Jamie McCaffrey (flickr). 

Sources in the Canadian military have confirmed that Canada will be sending troops to Ukraine in a “non-combative” role.

Canadian troops will be joining U.S. troops already stationed in the area and it is speculated that the Canadian forces will be used for “training operations”.

The announcement follows months after Canada imposed sanctions against Russia in the wake of global condemnation of Vladimir Putin’s aggression towards the region.

Opponents of the military action referred to it as a “Tip In Promise”. When asked to elaborate, a Liberal insider explained, “It’s the equivalent of fumbling around in the back seat of your parent’s car when you’re in high-school and the guy promises to only put the “tip in”. We all know, it never ends with just the tip. More is going to happen”.

“And let’s be clear”, our Mooseclean’s source said, “this isn’t about doubting the strength or ability of our military. It’s about the federal government treating us like a naïve teenage virgin, except we’ve been f*cked before.”

Mooseclean’s will continue to follow the story as more is released.

Jennifer Bell

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