An area cat who observed a steady decline in affection since aging out of the “cute kitten” phase recently embarked on an innovative new strategy: trying to assume the appearance of his owner’s new love interest—beer.

While clearly thicker than a stubbie, taller than a longneck, and furrier than both, the cat’s ingenuity in trying to trick his owner into picking him up is something to be admired.

Ira Reda of Welland, Ontario, admits that while he has fed and watered his pet consistently, he has been recently neglecting the cat’s emotional needs .

“Point made,” he acknowledged. “I drink right handed. I’ve got two hands. Going forward, there’s no excuse.”

Lonely spouses and significant others: take note.

By Sebastian Panache

Editor-in-Chief. You can follow him on Twitter @SebPanache, except he quit posting there after Elon bought it. Search for Mooseclean's on Mastodon instead.

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