Following the release of Ubuntu 17.04 codenamed “Zesty Zapus”, Mark Shuttleworth announced revised plans for the upcoming 17.10 release due in October.  The operating system’s originally planned designation “Amiable Airdale” has been rethought, and a new name chosen.

To announce this change and in response to numerous requests on the Ubuntu listserv, Shuttleworth made a public appearance to provide free software fans and curious onlookers with a glimpse into the future of Ubuntu development.

Leaflets distributed to all attendees contained a roadmap of future release code names, including names for those letters that were previously missed due to a lack of time, a shortage of literate employees, and a general lack of enthusiasm about playing neat word games with South African zoology.

“And so I’d like to introduce you to the monikers for our future release cycles,” Mark announced, referring to the following list:

  • 17.10 – Asinine Aardwolf
  • 18.04 – Butch Brubru
  • 18.10 – Co-dependent Chimpanzee
  • 19.04 – Dastardly Dragonfly
  • 19.10 – Evocative Earwig
  • 20.04 – Facetious Firefinch
  • 20.10 – Grouchy Gerbil
  • 21.04 – Halfhearted Hare
  • 21.10 – Impetuous Impala
  • 22.04 – Jovial Jackal
  • 22.10 – Kissy Kipunji
  • 23.04 – Loyal Lemur
  • 23.10 – Modest Mouse * (litigation pending)
  • 24.04 – Nifty Nematode
  • 24.10 – Open-minded Ostrich
  • 25.04 – Petulant Porcupine
  • 25.10 – Queer Quailfinch
  • 26.04 – Reputable Rhebok
  • 26.10 – Self-actualized Shrew
  • 27.04 – Tolerant Titmouse
  • 27.10 – Unpretentious Umberhulk
  • 28.04 – Virile Viper
  • 28.10 – Wanton Whale
  • 29.04 – Xenophobic X-Ray Fish
  • 29.10 – Yodeling Yellow-spotted Rock Hyrax
  • 30.04 – Zealous Zebra

He continued: “As we navigate into heretofore uncharted regions, I believe it is essential that we relish in the delightful guffaws of the jackal, embrace the rebellious anti-sociality of the porcupine, and keep striving toward the apex of personal development epitomized by the shrew,” Shuttleworth evangelized.

Question and answer period began with a resurrection of the Hoary Hedgehog / Hardy Heron debacle: “I want to formally apologize for this. I’m deeply, dreadfully, painfully sorry for reusing the letter ‘H’ before fully exhausting the supply of other available letters, and I want to pledge to you all — especially those of you who’ve lost sleep, jobs, and marriages — that I will never, ever, EVER permit this sort of procedural error again.”

When asked if he had personally reviewed all of the names of the upcoming releases, Shuttleworth affirmed confidently. When asked if he knew the meanings of “asinine” or “co-dependent”, of if he knew that an “Umber Hulk” was, in fact, a fictional monster created by Gary Gygax for the role-playing game Dungeons & Dragons, Shuttleworth paused and held his chin pensively. After a moment’s reflection, he assured the attending reporters that he would personally look into the matter, but encouraged interested persons to file a bug report at

By Sebastian Panache

Editor-in-Chief. You can follow him on Twitter @SebPanache, except he quit posting there after Elon bought it. Search for Mooseclean's on Mastodon instead.

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