Gym regulars resolve to stay away until new members give up

Photo: Cumi Danciki (CC BY)

WINNIPEG—Neighborhood gym Hard Bodies has seen a 35% increase in membership since January 1.  However, the gym is no more crowded than usual.

“Happens every year,” said gym owner, Otis Detmore.  “The regulars clear out for a few weeks and give the newbies enough time to realize they’ve overestimated their commitment and abandon their workouts.”

Statistics show that by mid-February, most new members will stop going to the gym.  “It’s really just a waiting game,” said long-time Hard Bodies member Matt Cromby.  “Us regulars actually look forward to this time of year.  It’s our annual vacation from routine workouts.  We use the time to rest our bodies or try the latest underground fitness craze.”

In other health-related news, sports injuries increase sharply in the months of January and February.

Molly Donovan

Molly Donovan

I grew up in the USA, but don’t hold that against me because I’m also Canadian.

Just think of me as the mole.

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