Mr. Anderson addresses the Tax Court of Canada  (Photo: Haroldo Ferrary (flickr) CC-BY-SA 2.0)

In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes.

Benjamin Franklin

CALGARY—Herman Anderson hated paying taxes.  He railed against government greed his entire adult life, calling the nation’s rate of taxation criminal and unfair.  But on May 4th, Anderson had the last laugh.

“Fuck you, Canada Revenue!” were reportedly the last words uttered by Anderson the day before the extended tax submission deadline.

“The old guy was clutching his chest with one hand and a sheaf of papers with the other,” said EMT Sharon Lyle.  “When we arrived at the house, he was alternately laughing and gasping for air.  He kept saying I win!  I win!

Anderson’s nephew and the executor of his will, Robert Smalls, confirmed that his uncle was very opinionated when it came to tax time.  “Uncle Herman was generally a laid-back guy.  He liked to watch TV and take walks around his acreage.  But every April, he’d change into a ranting anarchist.”

Smalls said Anderson loathed giving any of his money to the government and hated sending in his tax return.  But he also refused to hire an accountant to do it for him, or file online.  “Herman would work himself into a frenzy getting all the paperwork together and filling in the forms each year.  It’s astonishing he never had a heart attack before now.”

When Smalls met with Anderson’s lawyer to go over the will, he was surprised to learn that he was now responsible for filing the deceased man’s taxes.  “This is bullshit!” shouted Smalls.  Anderson’s lawyer went on to tell Smalls that funeral expenses are not tax exempt and referred his client to Guide T4011, Preparing Returns for Deceased Persons and Information Sheet RC4111, What to do following a death.

By Molly Donovan

I grew up in the USA, but don't hold that against me because I'm also Canadian. Just think of me as the mole.

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