LONDON, England—Ceremonies were held last weekend to celebrate Elizabeth’s 60th year as HR manager for Great Britain INC, a position she acquired when her father George retired from the company.
NORTH BAY, Ontario—Shawn McIntyre’s unrelenting Facebook posts on subjects ranging from Monsanto to oil corruption make him a better person than all of us and we should be ashamed for not sharing his personal views.
TORONTO—In an unprecedented turn of events today regarding the alleged Rob Ford crack video, the Toronto Mayor revealed it’s all true, stating that he was just doing his civic duty in keeping dangerous drugs off the street by smoking all of them.
TORONTO—Darren Grant of Scarborough, Ontario is having a hard time relating to his peers as he is not fully caught up on the new season of Arrested Development released this week on Netflix.
“I feel out of sync with the human race. I don’t understand anything people are saying anymore.” Grant explains. “Just give me a few weeks, I promise I’ll get around to it.”
But it seems too little too late…