Mooseclean’s gets first look at extended census


Photo: Statistics Canada

OTTAWA—The new Liberal government announced the reinstatement of the long-form census shortly after taking office.  Nixed in 2010, the 61-question form is seen as invasive by opponents.  However, proponents say it will provide much-needed information on Canadians, leading to better government. 

Below is a sample of some questions you will be legally obligated to answer.

  • Are you currently, or have you ever, shoveled snow onto a neighbor’s driveway?
  • Do you put ketchup on your KD?
  • Finish the sentence.  Maple syrup is to Canada as Justin Trudeau is to _______.
  • How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
  • If you found $20 on the street, would you spend it on poutine?  Or spend eight hours asking everyone in the vicinity if it was theirs?
  • Are you married?  Would you like to be married?  Can I call you?
  • Do you speak any language other than French or English, excluding Klingon?
  • What would be the most offensive racial slur someone could call you?
  • Do you have a University degree in something other than communications?
  • Do you spend more time cleaning house or watching Netflix?
  • Do you spend more hours at work or watching Netflix?
  • Do you make enough money to be a home owner in Toronto or Vancouver?
  • How much of your earnings did you fail to claim on your income tax last year?  If you answered more than $0, please see attached revenue form.
Molly Donovan

Molly Donovan

I grew up in the USA, but don’t hold that against me because I’m also Canadian.

Just think of me as the mole.

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