Racism fires Michael Richards, hires up-and-comer Paula Deen

with illustration by finklebottom

illustration by finklebottomAfter a tumultuous week, Racism finally announced that former Seinfeld star and long time spokesperson Michael Richards would be let go to make room for a fresh, new face.

“It’s a business decision,” said Richards, “and while I’m upset, I ultimately know why it was made. I have nothing but respect for Paula, I think she’ll take it further than I ever could!”

This was a long time coming. As many remember, Richards was hired almost 10 years ago with a promising outlook. But nearly a decade of sub-par effort has forced Racism to go with a new public identity, and as we’re learning, it’s a big change.

“Paula Deen is everything we’re looking for in revitalizing our brand. A southern belle with a great attitude and a natural talent for promoting our message.”

Once thought to be on the brink of foreclosure, Racism is now poised to make a big comeback thanks to the new ‘Queen of Butter & Bigotry’, but it still remains to be seen if they can bounce back in a marketplace that has long since evolved beyond the need for their services.

illustration by finklebottom

Jay Milley

Jay Milley

Lives in Toronto. Rugged indoorsman. Great with power cords. Follow on Twitter @jaymilley

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