Local man still only on Season 2 of Arrested Development
TORONTO—Darren Grant of Scarborough, Ontario is having a hard time relating to his peers as he is not fully caught up on the new season of Arrested Development released this…
Rob Ford’s dog resigns citing violence, substance abuse, infidelity
TORONTO—The chips just keep falling for Toronto's beleaguered mayor: nacho chips, casino chips, and now animal microchips. Word came late last night that Ford's beloved mongrel Dorf had run away…
It’s finally official: Ottawa is Canada’s most boring city
TORONTO—Mooseclean's pollsters are cavorting wildly in the lobby today, which is to say that pleasant grins are being exchanged between staff normally too reserved to make eye contact. Why? We…
Survey says Ottawans might trade Watson for Ford
OTTAWA—In a survey conducted exclusively for Mooseclean's, 25% of individuals polled would consider trading Ottawa's counsellor-turned-mayor Jim Watson for Toronto's hoodlum-turned-mayor Rob "F-ing" Ford. Some respondents agreed to provide comments…
Wynne on Ford: ‘Fess up, smoke up, drop out’
TORONTO—Premier Kathleen Wynne is tired of Rob Ford's fat boy frat boy brand of politics, if her latest statement is any indication. "I'm tired of Rob Ford's fat boy frat…
Duffy, Ford considering charity wrestling to improve images
OTTAWA—Reports are surfacing that in an attempt to mutually boost their tarnished images, ex-Tory Mike Duffy and Toronto Mayor Rob Ford are in talks to wrestle at a public fundraiser…