The news, improved.
SAN DIEGO, California—Authorities reported today the discovery of a five-foot-wide underground tunnel that they believe to be the work of traffickers operating along the U.S.-Mexican border. In addition to providing…
TORONTO—Darren Grant of Scarborough, Ontario is having a hard time relating to his peers as he is not fully caught up on the new season of Arrested Development released this…
It's a tough job being Amanda Bynes these days. Once the darling of Nickelodeon, she went on to make a number of forgettable movies, fail miserably as a fashion designer,…
TORONTO—The chips just keep falling for Toronto's beleaguered mayor: nacho chips, casino chips, and now animal microchips. Word came late last night that Ford's beloved mongrel Dorf had run away…
FORT SMITH, Arkansas—A “valued, part-time Associate” employee of Walmart Stores Inc. has admitted to stealing an estimated $5,000 in cheap foreign-made merchandise from the world’s largest retailer. Tim Conklin, 67,…
TORONTO—Mooseclean's pollsters are cavorting wildly in the lobby today, which is to say that pleasant grins are being exchanged between staff normally too reserved to make eye contact. Why? We…
A federal court judge has reached a decision in the 'robocalls' scandal, confirming that an attempt was made to affect the results in six ridings, and big whoop. No candidates…
OTTAWA—In a survey conducted exclusively for Mooseclean's, 25% of individuals polled would consider trading Ottawa's counsellor-turned-mayor Jim Watson for Toronto's hoodlum-turned-mayor Rob "F-ing" Ford. Some respondents agreed to provide comments…
OTTAWA—Prime Minister Harper is leaving absolutely no doubt about his role in the Duffy repayment scandal. "It was Wright," he said. "The person, I mean, not the payout. And his…
TORONTO—Premier Kathleen Wynne is tired of Rob Ford's fat boy frat boy brand of politics, if her latest statement is any indication. "I'm tired of Rob Ford's fat boy frat…