Iowa to Issue Driver’s Licences to the Blind
Fresh off the implementation of inclusive reforms allowing legally blind residents to carry and use firearms, Iowa announced plans on Monday to allow the legally blind to drive vehicles.
30-year friendship ends at altar
LOCAL—Martha and Jarvis met as children on the playground. They lived on the same block, went to the same schools, and attended universities in the same city, all the while…
Car accidents kill thousands each year, let’s resolve to do better
As part of their yearly public outreach plan, rural and municipal police services across Canada are raising awareness about the hazards of road travel.
Health Canada issues weather warning
As summer temperatures give way to cooler temperatures, Health Canada is once again warning Canadians that a sudden shift from bitching about the heat and humidity, to bitching about the…
Skinny jean shortage reaches crisis point
TORONTO—“Finished? Finished?” asks a woman collecting empties. This is a typical scene at Trinity Bellwoods Park: small groups of young men in tight jeans sit in clusters, drinking beer and…
Experts predict serious days ahead
Psychiatrists, humourologists and 1-900 psychics are predicting a deep recession in the amount of contrived lunacy, a recent study has found. "This is a grim forecast indeed," said Bartholomew Cornplaster,…
Newer, even better version of Sammy Yatim shooting emerges
TORONTO—New video footage of the Sammy Yatim shooting has surfaced, Mooseclean's has learned. This time in crisp, clear high definition.
Ford outraged by Sammy Yatim shooting
TORONTO—Addressing media at a press conference late Tuesday, Mayor Rob Ford expressed anger and embarrassment over his police department's fatal shooting of a young man on a Toronto streetcar.
Britons anxiously await news of whether sex works or not
The much anticipated due date for Kate Middleton's child has come and gone, and a nation holds its collective breath for proof that sex is a thing they can do.
Russian court sentences dead lawyer to life in prison retroactively
MOSCOW—Sergei Magnitsky, a Russian attorney imprisoned and awaiting trial for suspected tax evasion, was unexpectedly released last week after his cellmate found him unresponsive. Doctors later discovered he was suffering…