Newer, even better version of Sammy Yatim shooting emerges
TORONTO—New video footage of the Sammy Yatim shooting has surfaced, Mooseclean's has learned. This time in crisp, clear high definition.
Ford outraged by Sammy Yatim shooting
TORONTO—Addressing media at a press conference late Tuesday, Mayor Rob Ford expressed anger and embarrassment over his police department's fatal shooting of a young man on a Toronto streetcar.
Dryers suspected in Ontario women’s underwear thefts
HAMILTON TOWNSHIP, Ontario—After investigating a number of persons of interest in relation to a rash of unusual thefts in and around the Town of Cobourg, Northumberland O.P.P. now have suspects…
Loblaws to share shelves with Shoppers… for now
TORONTO—Loblaws has announced a $12.4 billion deal to acquire Shoppers Drug Mart, pending shareholder approval. Mooseclean’s had a chance to sit down with Galen G. Weston, executive chairman of Loblaw…
Best Mayor Ever
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford holds the cookie we baked, proclaiming him "Best Mayor" in Canada, and perhaps best mayor anywhere, ever. Mooseclean's also sent him a love note in honour…
Ford decrees that pie charts be made with real pie
TORONTO—Citing confusion over his understanding of the amount of funding that the Province of Ontario would be contributing to Toronto's subway extension into Scarborough, Mayor Rob Ford has introduced a…
Mayor Rob Ford refuses to add canoe lanes to Toronto roads
with illustration & reporting by finklebottom TORONTO—If the aftermath of Monday's flood in Toronto, where a month's worth of rain fell on the city within a few hours, environmentalists and…
Wayward Senators, Ministers to be outfitted with GPS tracking devices
The Prime Minister has greenlit a secret project intended to deter future recurrances of expense travel scandals. First conceived of in response to former Minister of National Defence Peter MacKay's…
City of Toronto ‘a social experiment’, scientist admits
TORONTO—Even casual observers of the developments in Toronto over the years must at some time have thought, "Is this for real?" Now, we can definitely say, "No. It wasn't." Dr.…
Man buys transit IDs, bus passes, for ‘stuff’
OTTAWA—“Most people think their stuff is more important than other peoples’ stuff,” says Sheldon Vestige. “In my case, it’s actually true.” Vestige, a product demonstrator and infamous public transit rights…