TORONTO—This morning, Premier Doug Ford held a press conference at Queen’s Park to update Ontarians on his efforts to balance the provincial budget. He was greeted by a rousing chorus of coughs, signs full of misspelled words, and a handful… Continue Reading
OTTAWA—Over 1,200 wristbands embossed with the words “United we stand / divided we fall” along with “#1998” have been purchased by members of the Ottawa Police Service and their supporters. 1998 is the badge number of Constable Daniel Montsion, the officer charged… Continue Reading
While some turn up their nose at the thought of more public toilets in the city’s LRT stations, Mayor Jim Watson smells opportunity. “Not everyone is thrilled at the sight of exposed penises,” J-Wat remarked, “but that’s what we can expect… Continue Reading
After resolutely refusing to yield to public outrage over the construction of the controversial Victims of Communism Memorial on land Parliament had approved for a new Federal Court building, the government appears to be ready to offer a conciliatory gesture.
The Toronto Maple Leafs today announced that Mike Babcock will become the 30th Head Coach in team history.
“Mike will take this team where it hasn’t been since 1967—the fairway,” proclaimed MLSE president Tim Leiweke.
Ahead of the Pan Am games, Joe Fresh will need to give volunteers the shirt off its back. The clothier is on the hook after delivering a botched order of 60,000 polo-style uniforms.
High-end Toronto homeowners are about to have a convicted terrorist as a neighbour.
Omar Khadr, who killed a US soldier at the age of 15 during the war in Afghanistan, has put a downpayment on 141 Bridle Path.
A vocal group calling itself Ontario Parents and Students Strike is urging parents to withdraw their children from classes for up to a week in protest of the province’s new sex-ed curriculum.
A crowd of approximately 3,000 angry parents gathered in front of Queen’s Park in Toronto to protest the Ontario Liberal government and their radical sex-education program developed by a pedophile.
A therapist is urging 28-year-old fan Trish Kelsey to sever all ties with her favourite sports team, whose perennial losing ways have become abusive.