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Crime

PewDiePie Asks White Supremacists to Unsubscribe

March 19, 2019Molly Donovan Leave a Comment

NEW ZEALAND—The Mosque shootings in Christchurch, New Zealand on Friday left 50 people dead and as many injured. The accused murderer live-streamed part of the attack and called out “subscribe to PewDiePie” during the incident. What is a PewDiePie? It’s… Continue Reading →

Crime, Donovan, Entertainment, Web

Neighbouring Galaxy files restraining order against Neil deGrasse Tyson

December 14, 2018Contributor Leave a Comment

SPACE – The Whirlpool Galaxy (Messier 51a), a gravitationally bound system of billions of stars located approximately 15-35 million light-years from Earth, has filed a restraining order against Neil deGrasse Tyson. Tyson, an astrophysicist and science educator, has been embroiled in controversy… Continue Reading →

Crime, Science, Sex

Cosby to Enlighten New Generation of Abusers with Speaking Tour

June 27, 2017Molly Donovan Leave a Comment

ALABAMA—After escaping sexual assault charges in a trial that resulted in a hung jury, Bill Cosby is ready to educate the masses. “I thought to myself, how can I monetize my exploitation of women?” said Cosby. “And with the help… Continue Reading →

Crime, Donovan, Entertainment, Sex

Ottawa Police unite in support of fatal beating death

March 30, 2017Sebastian Panache Leave a Comment

OTTAWA—Over 1,200 wristbands embossed with the words “United we stand / divided we fall” along with “#1998”  have been purchased by members of the Ottawa Police Service and their supporters. 1998 is the badge number of Constable Daniel Montsion, the officer charged… Continue Reading →

Crime, Death, Intentionally Not Funny, Life, Ontario, Opinion, Ottawa, Panache

F**k a duck? Don’t mind if I do…

March 21, 2017Contributor Leave a Comment

WE-SWEAR-WE-ARE-NOT-MAKING-THIS-UP DEPT. Photo: Mohd Fahmi Mohd Azmi, flickr A man was detained in Bursa province in Turkey’s Marmara region for allegedly raping a duck, daily Habertürk reported. Police forces detained the man following complaints from his inlaws, who claimed he… Continue Reading →

Crime, Life, Sex, True Story, World

Killer nurse to publish poetry collection

October 26, 2016Sebastian Panache Leave a Comment

Elizabeth Tracy Mae Wettlaufer, accused of first-degree murder in the deaths of eight Ontario nursing-home wards, is poised to become a published author. According to trusted sources, several North American publishing houses are vying for the rights to distribute original… Continue Reading →

Crime, Death, Life, Panache, Poetry

CBC wants sensitivity training for Borel after she rips them a new one

May 18, 2016Molly Donovan Leave a Comment

Image credit: CBC TORONTO—After having her sexual assault charges against Jian Gomeshi settled by peace bond last week, Kathryn Borel made a statement to the media.  In the wake of what she said, the CBC is demanding Borel undergo sensitivity… Continue Reading →

Crime, Donovan, Media, Sex

Trudeau grants Osama Bin Laden Canadian citizenship postmortem

March 16, 2016Brian Leave a Comment

Photo: Alex Guibord, flickr (CC BY 2.0) “This is a great day of Canada as we begin a new era of positivity,” beamed Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau as he granted Osama Bin Laden Canadian citizenship.

Canada, Crime, Feelgood, Government, ModernGinger

P.E.I. man ticketed for texting while driving…in his driveway

December 7, 2015Sebastian Panache Leave a Comment

Image: CBC First, it was a man driving through a Tim Horton’s early in the morning to get his daily coffee in Beaumont, Alberta when he was stopped and ticketed by police for texting while driving. Now, Eric Sanders of… Continue Reading →

Canada, Crime, Law, Life, Panache

Jian Ghomeshi ready to Hatefuck Your Morning with new webcast

November 26, 2015Sebastian Panache Leave a Comment

Photo: Brenda Lee, flickr. From the basement of his mother’s home in Thornhill, Ontario, disgraced former ‘Q’ host Jian Ghomeshi is quietly rebuilding his media empire. Capitalizing on his new reputation within the public consciousness, the fired CBC radio host… Continue Reading →

Crime, Entertainment, Media, National, Panache, Sex

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