National Pride and International Ignorance
NORTH AMERICA—It’s a momentous week for patriotism in the important part of North America. Both Canadians and Americans will use their national holidays as an excuse to eat BBQ, enjoy…
Fucking A! Swearing makes you feel better, scientists say
The next time someone tells you to stop cursing, tell them it's therapeutic... then tell them to fuck off. This according to new research by Richard Stephens and some other…
“Log Driver’s Waltz” displaces “Gangnam Style” in popular dance craze reign
Don't cry, Psy, but a new dance sensation is sweeping the nation.
Man fails to communicate awesomeness of Kraft Dinner to Mexican In-laws
After multiple attempts, a local man hung his head in despair and accepted his inability to communicate the awesomeness of Kraft Dinner Macaroni and Cheese to his Mexican in-laws, who…
Gay Army to protect Ukraine
KIEV—After the citizens of Crimea voted to secede, other parts of Ukraine are concerned. Will Vladimir Putin use the vote as an excuse to annex the rest of the country?…
My Answer: Lesbian slaves in bondage
Q: Genesis 16:8 seems to promote same-sex relations, infidelity, and partner abuse. Possibly BSDM. Am I reading it wrong? — S.C.
Homely man’s remarriage proves love more than blind
Howard Brandt isn't exactly the man of most women's dreams. While his 5'6” tall and roughly 305 pound frame often compels a second look from the opposite sex, it's generally…
Moustache misread maddens Medicine Hat man
An Alberta man is suing his former East Vancouver neighbourhood for refusing to acknowledge the ironic ethos behind his 1970s moustache. DJ McSweeney – now known as Bradley Brummond of…
My Answer: Eating your children
Q: Deuteronomy 28:53 tells us that "because of the dire straits to which you will be reduced when your enemy besieges you, you will eat your own children, the flesh…
France relieved by Hollande infidelity revelations
While many around the world were troubled by reports of French President François Hollande's extra-marital affair with actress Julie Gayet, citizens of France were in a celebratory mood today. "Before…