Vic Toews to retire. Your reaction?
OTTAWA—Drunken, slurred reports were overheard at the Parliament Pub late Tuesday night (possibly early Wednesday morning) that pedophile basher and Minister of Public Safety Vic Toews, 60, will retire today,…
Toronto woman charged with throwing drink at Mayor, missing
TORONTO—Yes, here's yet another chapter in the sordid life of Rob Ford, which apparently you never tire of hearing about given the enormous number of reads and clickthroughs we recieve…
Prince Philip undergoes surgery while Elizabeth has appointment with Doctor Who
LONDON, England—Buckingham Palace reports that Prince Philip of Britain is "going to pull through" after undergoing exploratory abdominal surgery at the urging of his Master, the Queen. Elizabeth II, who…
Whale swims through downtown London
LONDON, England—Onlookers were puzzled Friday when a whale swam up the River Thames, eventually running aground near Parliament. Experts on the scene identified it as a Northern bottlenose. “Frankly, I…
British co-workers celebrate manager’s 60th year of steady employment
LONDON, England—Ceremonies were held last weekend to celebrate Elizabeth's 60th year as HR manager for Great Britain INC, a position she acquired when her father George retired from the company.
Facebook activist better than everyone
NORTH BAY, Ontario—Shawn McIntyre's unrelenting Facebook posts on subjects ranging from Monsanto to oil corruption make him a better person than all of us and we should be ashamed for…
Canada’s city mayors support Ford
TORONTO—"Everything is going fine," Rob Ford has said. "I'm keeping taxes low. I've saved a billion dollars. I've been keeping crack off Toronto streets nearly single-handedly. Things are great." But…
Rob Ford just trying to keep drugs off the street
TORONTO—In an unprecedented turn of events today regarding the alleged Rob Ford crack video, the Toronto Mayor revealed it's all true, stating that he was just doing his civic duty…
Rob Ford’s dog resigns citing violence, substance abuse, infidelity
TORONTO—The chips just keep falling for Toronto's beleaguered mayor: nacho chips, casino chips, and now animal microchips. Word came late last night that Ford's beloved mongrel Dorf had run away…
How to win an election: Lessons learned from the ‘robocalls’ scandal
A federal court judge has reached a decision in the 'robocalls' scandal, confirming that an attempt was made to affect the results in six ridings, and big whoop. No candidates…