Guy behind you reports that you drive like an asshole
LOCAL–After repeated honking, obscene gestures, and yelling out his window failed to get your attention, a local man is speaking out to the press in a final, desperate attempt to…
Competition Bureau investigating “Contractor for the Afterlife”
A local builder is claiming harassment by the federal government after his business was contacted by investigators from the Competition Bureau, an independent law enforcement agency that looks into potentially…
Hundreds feared dead in tragic anthill collapse
LOCAL—Seventy three ants were confirmed dead and hundreds remain missing after an accidental cave-in that occurred Wednesday at a colony on the upper east side, police reports say.
Canada Council Art Bank reveals new acquisitions
The Canada Council Art Bank, our nation's venerable champion of uninspired, unloved, and otherwise unwanted artwork, gave Mooseclean's a glimpse of new masterworks that will soon be available for rent…
Victims of Capitalism Memorial to be housed in abandoned Target store
After resolutely refusing to yield to public outrage over the construction of the controversial Victims of Communism Memorial on land Parliament had approved for a new Federal Court building, the…
‘Low Food’ diet craze sweeping the nation
Madonna is allegedly doing it. Carrie Fisher is probably doing it, too. Disney insists. So should you hop on the latest diet craze?
Against all odds, despite rumours: Abe Vigoda still alive
...Mickey Rooney, Lauren Bacall, Christopher Lee... they all have one thing in common: they're dead. Meanwhile, somewhere in New Jersey, Abe Vigoda doggedly continues his tireless living streak.
Wiggles reinvent as ‘Wiggers’ to recapture popularity with aging fanbase
"It's been a long road," says Anthony Field. Since founding The Wiggles in 1991, he's run the gamut from obscurity to fame and from grief to joy, then back again.
Google Doc aims to assist, replace physicians
In the latest initiative to make itself completely indispensable to the human race, Google has announced beta availability for its new physician replacement app.
Local man saddened that women unimpressed by testicles dangling from trailer hitch
Larry Anderson, 39, is a man in search of answers. Staring pensively out of the window of his blue Dodge Ram, his eyes search his surroundings for clues.